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How Ready Are You For a Commitment?

Answer the questions below honestly and objectively. The results will offer a better perspective of your situation and help assess how prepared you are for the responsibility of being a partner in a relationship.

1‑ Do you know who you really are?

Have you recently gotten in touch with your inner self?

Are you satisfied with the results of your self-exploration?

Is there a need for change?

2‑ Do you know exactly what you want?

What are your personal dreams & goals?

Can you characterize your ideal partner?

Have you clearly defined what you have to offer as a partner in a relationship?

3‑ What are your requirements and needs?

Are you aware of what you truly need and require being content and happy in your life and relationships?

Do you know your limits and boundaries?

4‑ Is your life all you would like it be?

Is your life vision in tact?

Is your life rewarding & fulfilling?

What is missing?

5‑ Are there outside influences in your life that would strain a relationship?

Would work, career, children, family and/or friends restrict or stress your relationship commitment?

Would they burden a potential partner?

6‑ Do you have unresolved financial or legal matters?

7‑ Are there health related issues of concern?

Does your physical or mental health alter or interfere with your life and relationship goals?

How would they affect a potential partner?

Are you emotionally self-sufficient?

8‑ Do you hold a healthy respect for the opposite sex?

Do you harbor any anger or animosity towards the opposite sex?

Do you carry past relationship issues that haven't been resolved?

9‑ Do you have effective communication and social skills?

Are you able to assert your needs?

Are you able to say 'no'?

Do you have a positive outlook and attitude?

Do you get along well with others?

Are you approachable?

10‑ Do you have appropriate relationship skills?

Do you have appropriate knowledge and understanding of the type of relationship you seek?

Are you prepared for dedicated sexual intimacy?

Would you be an asset in your relationship?

Successful relationships take commitment, effort, fortitude, dedication, planning and good communication skills. Planning for success will command success.

Learning to Love Yourself

The foundation of self-love and positive esteem is based in a true belief in yourself and in having faith in your qualities and capabilities. It requires trusting your intuition, judgment and choices. It is also vital to understand, accept and appreciate the benefits of your limitations. A holistic perspective and a positive affirmation about the realities of you are necessary to achieve your goals. Visualizing and actualizing your dreams and aspirations creates energy and power, which allow you to focus on the positive thinking processes. Believing it is possible to live your dreams is a major step in getting there.

Attitude is everything. Whatever you affirm as real, the mind interprets as reality. Therefore, speaking of positives means the mind will think positively. How you see yourself is how others see you. Your aura carries the energies of your thoughts and feelings with both the past and present represented. That projection of you touches everyone you come in contact with, allowing those around you to feel what you feel. If you think yourself a victim of life and your environment, others will see you in that light. Feeling confident, self-assured and capable allows those vibrations to radiate that sense of self to others. There is truth in the notion that power exists in positive thinking and a positive attitude not only presents an alluring aura but also brings inner peace and freedom.

Focusing on your assets and potential will motivate and inspire a call to action. If a plan happens to misfire, you learn from the experience, modify it and try again. The modification process often involves re-evaluating requirements and changing expectations. If goals are set too high or expectations overwhelming, then achieving success will appear as an impossible feat and put you at high risk of failure. Attaining goals should not be attempted in one, all-encompassing, swift step. Setting one attainable goal at a time, taking one small step at a time helps to create achievement. Rewarding yourself for each accomplishment gives positive strokes and offers a greater probability of realizing success.

Any unresolved issues from the past can create obstacles in the present. It is imperative to deal with past pain, grieve losses, put away the unrealistic expectations and give guilt and anger to their rightful owner. Turn your pain to power, let it motivate and push you to achieve your goals. Turn fear into determination. Find the positive that exists in every negative. Changing your language to reflect a positive outlook will prove beneficial. ‘I think I can’ changed to ‘I will’ affirms that reality to the mind. Think in terms of what there is to do rather than placing your concentration on the things, which are left undone.

Living life to your own specifications inspires great things. Outside influences can prove to be quite damaging and often hinder the process of attaining goals and realizing dreams. Only you know what is best for you and you are not compelled to live your life according to the dictates of others. It’s okay to be you without the approval of anyone other than you. Choose your own path, expand your limits and explore all of the possibilities life has to offer. Live life rather than be content to exist in it. Greatness is achieved by providing an environment for greatness to grow

Just How Important is Sex in a Relationship?

Sexual issues hold enough impact to disrupt relationship commitments and marriages, making a clear statement of it’s importance in our over all compatibility. Sex concerns play a major role in the high rate of divorce and is the cause for most all incidences of cheating. With the divorce rate and relationship failures rising above 50%, one would have to conclude that a great number of people are dissatisfied with their sex lives. It would seem wise to give serious thought to this aspect of our relationships and question the cause for such high rate of failure. Do today’s fast paced lifestyles affect our decisions regarding a partner? Are our relationship choices based in lusty infatuation, driven by fleeting emotions? Do we suffer from a lack of proper planning?

Successful relationship ventures require planning for healthy and satisfying sexual experiences. Sexual compatibility contributes to the over all health and well-being of the relationship itself. In the beginning of a relationship couples discuss all aspects of life to determine compatibility and make decisions about the future. They talk openly about their political views, spiritual and moral beliefs, address needs and desires and share their dreams and aspirations. Sex too has a place as a main consideration. Sexual needs are viable and any verbal or written agreements involving a relationship commitment should include a parley and alliance regarding sexual needs. Any partner who fails to meet those needs would then be in breach of the marriage vows or commitment agreement, leaving a standing order for an out clause. The subject of sexual needs, wants, and desires must play a critical role in the discussions and negotiations to better ensure success.

Sex is not merely an event or a task to be done as a matter of course. The bonding it presents, in its truest form, is the essence of a lasting commitment. When sex is ‘just sex', the chances for long-term happiness and contentment diminish greatly, therefore it is important that this subject be addressed and agreement reached, before any actual commitment takes place. Designing a plan in accordance with a mutually agreed upon checklist of needs, wants and desires is a good standard practice. Needs can’t be ignored and will eventually become deal breakers. Settling for whatever is offered usually warrants a discontented mate and cheating. Neither of those end results is an acceptable alternative to designing a lasting plan and getting what we really want.

Any relationship requires honesty and in planning for success it is wise to remain honest with yourself and your partner about your sexual needs. It is also important to be honest about your capabilities to meet the needs of your partner. Misrepresenting the facts or hiding your true sexual needs and desires will only prolong the inevitable failure of the relationship. For those who have little time or interest in the confines of the typical relationship, it is probably a good idea to consider a ‘friends with benefits’ arrangement rather than making a commitment that is doomed to fail.

Sex is an integral part of the human existence and cannot be ignored or taken lightly. It holds great significance in our physical, emotional and spiritual well-being. The importance of the sexual experience in our relationships holds great significance and will usually determine the harmony and balance we all seek.

Getting More From Life

Most of us experience merely a small portion of what life has to offer. We rarely take advantage of all that is available to us and in fact, become complacent and remain content to exist in life rather than live it. We often allow our dreams and fantasies to remain locked away, safely hidden in the dark recesses of our minds. We fail to recognize how deeply those hidden secrets affect our every day lives, how greatly they impact our emotional and physical well-being and the limits they place on our expectations and realities. Why do we place such restrictions on life? What prevents us from taking that excursion into uncharted territory?

From birth we are placed in a restrictive bubble, seeing the world through the eyes of parents and family. As adolescents, we expand our knowledge and limits as we begin to experiment and explore our potential. We seek to discover our own identity and test our new designs. As adults we tend to lose that spirit of adventure and accept a pattern of existence, which portrays an accumulation of our fears and inhibitions. Governed by the restrictions of societal dictates, family and friends, we retreat to our bubble. This confinement usually leaves us feeling trapped and empty with many voids to fill. We dream of adventures outside of our self imposed boundaries, but ultimately limit ourselves to watching in awe as others dare to venture into that realm of unknown possibilities.

The good news is that we are not restricted to accepting what life offers us. We can and should take what we need and desire from it. Life is only as limited as we make it. It is everything we allow it to be. There is a way to live our dreams and experience fulfillment and reward. It requires that we put away our fears and inhibitions and begin to explore, experiment and rediscover all of the possibilities that exist. With a little effort, all things are possible. We examine our curiosities, dreams and the endless opportunities; and dare to try on a few fantasies. If it feels good…DO IT! Expanding limits and boundaries extends to endless possibilities. The adventure and resulting freedom are well worth the effort.

If you think it is impossible, ask yourself why. The answers lie within you. The way is open and the means are accessible. You can make it happen and get more from life. Having faith in your capabilities as well as owning a positive attitude and an open mind allows the confidence needed to begin the journey. Thinking outside the box and allowing for a creative flow of energies will offer many new paths. We have free reign of the universe and now is the time to explore it

Spicing Up Your Love Life

Throw out the Viagra and let nature take its course. Add spice to your sex life and enhance your solo adventures, using natural, healthy formulas whose benefits have proven safe and effective over thousands of years.

Most people aren’t aware of Mother Nature’s great gifts or have little faith in their capabilities. Herbs have been around since the beginning of time and their value substantiated in therapeutic as well as sexual capacities. Nature provides for our needs, and unlike today’s wonder drugs, both men and women may reap the benefits of their use. While only a few have been clinically tested, all have proven their effectiveness and safety over time. Man-made drugs come with many side affects and risks that usually put one or more parts of the body at risk, of harm, while fixing another. Drug manufacturers warn of the harm their miracle drugs can produce; yet we continue to use them.

Our sexual needs are basic essentials and nature has quite adequately addressed them without fear of risk or harm. Man-made male enhancement products carry a long list of side affects and warn of the dangers posed by an erection that lasts more than a few hours. Does that mean they are not only unsafe but are also designed for quickies, allowing for sex in metered doses? That poses a rather harsh and unnatural solution. Mother Nature holds the answers we seek. A few of the best are listed below.

1-Ginger is a common household spice by day and wild aphrodisiac by night.

It is a great stimulant, which increases blood flow to the genitals, stirring sexual sensations in both male and female users. It is also used therapeutically for gastrointestinal disturbances, as an anti-inflammatory, is a strong antioxidant and much more. A tea can be made from the shavings of the root as well as from the powdered spice. Extract and pill forms are sold at health food stores. Ginger has blood-thinning properties and is not recommended for those taking anticoagulants.

2-Damiana surpasses Viagra and any other sexual enhancer in its fabulous affects, safety and medicinal properties. It increases blood flow to the genitals, increases sensitivity, provides a marvelous euphoria and has a long lasting affect without posing risks. Its many therapeutic qualities make it an easy choice over the harmful drugs on the market. It is used to treat many ailments such as depression, digestive complaints and congestion to name a few. It is available in extract, drop or capsule form at any health food store.

3-Licorice has super energy enhancing properties, which make for a more active sex life. It stimulates female sex glands and is a great general health tonic for men. Some men who use licorice regularly, notice a significant increase in their sex drive. The list of ailments and problems it is used to treat is quite extensive. Licorice can be found at health food stores in extract form. The candy contains little or no licorice and is not useful for treating medical issues or for sexual enhancement. Anyone with high blood pressure should consult a physician before using licorice.

4-Ginseng is an energizer and revitalizer known as the king of herbs. Its name in Chinese literally means ‘root, or essence, of man and its fascinating history dates back thousands of years. It is a general tonic, which can improve stamina for sexual activities and the potency of male sperm. The list of therapeutic uses is extensive. Ginseng comes in many forms and is available at most any grocery and health food stores. Anyone with high blood pressure, hypoglycemia, heart disorders or asthma should use caution when taking ginseng.

5-Vodka is a great aphrodisiac and an even greater antioxidant when mixed in a shaken martini. Orange vodka holds those same properties as well, and adds emotional affects promoting a sense of loving attachment.

The Kama Sutra Company offers a wonderful line of sex enhancing products, which includes a safe, subtle pleasure balm for extended erection time. Most all of their products are edible and can add a little touch of spice to any sexual experience.

A complete list of Mother Nature’s contributions is available online or in bookstores. For further information please consult Nature’s Aphrodisiacs by Nancy L. Nickell, Prescription for Nutritional Healing by Phyllis A. Balch & James F. Balch, www.kamasutra.com , or your physician.

Anyone planning to use an herb or other natural product is advised to check warnings for possible problems relating to existing illness.

All sexual activities should remain safe, sane and always consensual.

Sacred Sex

In many cultures around the world, sex is held as a sacred spiritual experience. It is an awakening, which lifts the essence of the inner being to a place of heightened awareness. It brings together the human element with the grandness of the universe, as human sexual energies connect to a higher spiritual plane where man and the universe become one. This spiritual consciousness transcends the temporal sexual events most of us accept as standard.

Early writings such as the *The Kama Shastra and *The Kama Sutra provided documentation of the specific needs and protocols designed to facilitate the spiritual sexual experience and response. Those early compositions offered detailed orientation with regard to the value and importance of touch and position as well as the proper transfer and use of sexual energy to promote bonding, healing and the full body orgasmic response.

The human sexual essence is considered a vital component of daily religious practices and health regimes, for those who have learned to appreciate its influence and connection to all things. Celebrated rites and rituals include the spiritual forces of human sexuality. Transcendental experiences with divine powers can become entwined in our sex to inspire incredible happenings. Some have felt the presence and power of the divine One through the sexual experience.

It is fact that sexual energies play a major role in our overall health and well-being. One example bares the risks associated with pent up sexual energy, which necessitate it being moved on a regular basis. Early teachings insisted that the movement of the sexual energy was so vital that if a man could not have that need satisfied with his mate, he was to seek to have it met outside the relationship. While that dictate promoted ‘cheating,’ it did stress the seriousness of the connection and power of the sexual energy to our very existence.

Very few men are aware of the risks associated with male ejaculation or that it actually shortens their lifespan. Through the teachings of Taoist sexuality men are offered the experience of full body orgasms without ejaculating and with more rewarding results. This information can be found in the modern day writings of “The Multi-Orgasmic Man” by Mantack Chia.

Women hold the power of sex in their belly and it draws like a magnet. Most are unaware of this great power that lies within them and depend on the physical contact of others to stimulate and satisfy only their most basic needs. Early writings provided us with the methodology for orgasm without the benefit of the human touch. Women can orgasm as part of a deeply spiritual melding with the universe using only the power of the mind to connect to their spiritual sexual essence.

How we experience our sexuality holds a great affect on how we live life. It has an impact on the way we think and feel as well as on our actions and attitudes. We have the power to enhance or impede life’s offerings. What we don’t know and that which we are unwilling to explore leaves us limited and inhibited in our sexual experiences. We miss the beauty of all that we have available to us. The deeper we allow ourselves to venture, the deeper the pleasure and fulfillment.

We have been given a sacred gift`, which can provide unimaginable pleasures, if we only allow ourselves to remain open and experience it all. Finding your place in light of spiritual sexuality will only enhance your life experiences. It is growth, awakening and newly found treasures.